I believe in the analysis, release and transcendence of emotions, beliefs and childhood programming that obstruct our objectivity, growth, effectiveness, joy and ultimately our ability to love.
 
Self-analysis can, however, sometimes lead to even greater identification with the personality - thus decreasing rather than enhancing our happiness and satisfaction. On the other hand self-observation and analysis are essential for self-knowledge, evolution and happiness.
 
For that reason I would like to share here some thoughts on how we can balance these two needs:
1. Analyzing and understanding the mind and personality
2. Remembering that ultimately we are not our emotions, thoughts or the personality at all.  
 
Here are some thoughts:
 
1. Analyze in the Third Person.
We can analyze our emotions, beliefs and reactions in the third person, referring to «John» or «Mary» or our «personality» or «he», «she» or even«it». In this way we are continually reminded that we are not the one being analyzed. We are the witness, the observer of that mind - personality that is being analyzed and perhaps modified. It is important in such a cases that we maintain a feeling of understanding, love and acceptance for the «personality» we are observing and analyzing just as we would if we were psychotherapists working with someone who asked for or needed our help. We can imagine that we are our own personality’s psychotherapist and that we are lovingly helping it find greater clarity and  freedom concerning its issues.
 
2. Identify with others.
Try identifying with someone else  a number of times each day. Chose different people at different times and imagine you are them, wondering how you feel and what your needs and thoughts are as that person. Try both genders and all ages. Try people of various nationalities and religions. Imagine you are them and imagine what you might be feeling, needing and thinking if you were actually them at that moment. It does not matter it you are right or wrong. It is important that you letting go of identifying with your own personality for those few minutes.
You could also try this with animals and plants putting yourself in their «position» and wondering what you would need or feel. It is perhaps most important to do concerning persons we have difficulty understanding or are in conflict with.
This exercise increases our understanding and broadens our sense of self and circle of identification and eventually our circle of love.  It allows us to be less focused on how we feel and what we need and realize that we are not the center of the universe. 
It gradually leads to less selfishness and ego-centeredness.
Try it three times a day for just a few minutes and you will learn much about yourself, others and life.
 
3. Let go of the role identification
Our unpleasant emotions and issues are often created by our attachments and aversions, which in turn are created by our beliefs concerning what we «must have» in order to feel secure, worthy, in control, free and happy. However what we believe we «must have» depends on the roles we have identified with. If we are identified with the role of the parent, we might be attached to our childrens’ academic achievement. If we are identified with the role of the male or female (the soul is neither) we will be attached to being accepted, admired or desired by one or more of the other gender. If we are identified with the role of the child we might be attached to approval from our parents or have an aversion to their advice.
Each role identification creates a set of attachments and aversions that in turn create our most intense emotions. The solution in such a case is to remind ourselves that we are free souls in the process of evolution or that we are the universal consciousness observing the mind that is identifying with these roles and experiencing these emotions and that our true self worth and security have nothing to do with these roles and attachments. It is important that we play these roles well, with love and create, connect and serve through them, but we need to cease seeking our feelings of security, control and self-worth through them.
In this case, we simply remind ourselves that we are not these roles and that our self-worth and security have nothing to do with these attachments and fears.
 
3. Balance analysis with creative, spiritual and transcending experiences.
The trap if over identification with the ego by in self-analysis procedures can be balanced by experiential and transcending activities such as walking in nature, jogging, dancing, singing, chanting, praying, Sufi whirling, painting and any other form of creative, spiritual and or or nonintellectual activity. Such activities help us let go of the analytical mind and often to have transcendental experiences.
 
4. The Sedona Method.
This simple method of observation and release can often enable us to let go of unpleasant emotions without getting caught up in lengthy analysis. We simply identify the emotion that is bothering us and ask ourselves four simple questions which we answer yes or no and need not analyse or justify.
a. Can I accept and or welcome this emotion or that a part of myself is feeling this emotion?
b. Could I release or let go of this emotion?
c. Would I like to release or let go of this emotion?
d. When would I like to release or let go of this emotion?
This method is based on the fact that emotions are energy and that the nature of energy is to move and transform. Emotions that remain are blocked stagnant energies. Our emotions are not holding us. We are holding on to our emotions – either out of habit or because we subconsciously are gaining something from continuing to feel our fear, hut or anger etc. So the question is can I accept this «energy» and then can I allow it to flow and move on? It is our choice.
Thus we have a method which first focuses on the existence of a negative emotion and then allows it ti dissipate without giving importance to how the emotion got created.
The interesting thing about the Sedona Method is that one is encouraged to do the same with positive emotions thus leading to even higher states of awareness. (Most positive emotions are also based on identification with our personality’s needs.)
We will discuss this method in more detail in another article.
 
5.  Remember the truth.
We can remind ourselves frequently that we are not this body and mind, but rather an eternal consciousness observing the various automatic programmings that are occurring in the mind. It is  important to distinguish between having a body and mind and being one. We have a car but are not our car. We care for our car and it enables us to move around and arrive at our destination. We are not the personality. It does allow us to enjoy, function, learn, grow, evolve, create and serve here on the material level. Obviously we want to care for it and listen to its needs and love and accept it, while we simultaneously train it. When we leave our bodies, we will shed the body and then eventually the mind and personality. At that point, depending on what we believe we will experience ourselves as evolving souls or as undifferentiated, universal consciousness. (Take your choice.)
 
 
6. The Neti neti Meditation. (Neti = not that)
This favorite meditation of Sri Ramana Maharshi is quite simple. Sit with the spine straight and quite the mind, perhaps with some breathing. Then ask the question «who» or «what» am I. Allow your consciousness to seek out the answer to that question, keeping one important fact in mind. You cannot be something you can observe. In order to observe something or someone, you need to have a separate vantage point. Thus, if while sitting there in passive search for your true self, you observe your body sensations, emotions or thoughts, you cannot be them. Each time you observer some phenomenon appear in your consciousness, you eventually let it go as «not me».
This thought «not that, not that» eventually cease to be a conscious one and becomes an automatic process of letting go of every phenomenon in our consciousness until we eventually become aware of consciousness itself without modifications. Without bodily sensation, emotions, thoughts or any other type of limitation of consciousness.
This allows us to experience ourselves as consciousness rather than as a limited personality.
 
7. The "Transcendence Questionnaire"
After some discussions with members of our life training group, we have come up with an analytical approach that we hope will offer a combination of self-knowledge and transcendence.
 
It would probably require a small prelude like this:
 
«I can understand fully how such an event or situation would cause these emotions and want to support you as much as possible in your process. It is very natural and human for you to be feeling the way that you are and most likely I would feel the same in your position. Thus, your first step is to love and accept that part of yourself even though and whenever it is feeling this way and give it all the time it needs in order to move out of this, or move on.
 
«However if you would like to, we can also approach this from a alternative view point. We can do this only if you agree and would like to. Let me explain. Most religions and spiritual philosophies state that we are not actually these bodies and personalities but rather a spiritual being or consciousness that has temporarily taken these bodies and personalities in order to learn, grow and create. If this is true then you are not actually the personality who is suffering at this moment but your true identity is the soul or consciousness that is witnessing what is happening.
 
«Also according to such philosophies and theologies, whatever we are experiencing is actually a perfect opportunity to learn the specific lessons we have chosen to learn before we took these bodies. If this is true, then what is causing your pain or fear or anger at this moment is something you have actually «chosen» (perhaps before birth, perhaps now subconsciously or as a soul) to happen in order to offer yourself an opportunity to become spiritually, mentally and emotionally stronger and more aware of your true self. In such a case, you can gain so much by looking at this situation in that light, seeking to understand what you can learn and gain from this.
 
«Are you interested in answering some questions that might aid you here in both perceiving possible growth opportunities but also letting go of your identification of the personality?»
 
If the answer is yes, then we can continue.
 
1. Which are the emotions that your personality is feeling about this issue?
2. Which emotion would you like to work on first?
3. What exactly is the stimulus real or imaginary, from the past, present or future that is triggering these feelings for your personality?
4. Now what is the attachment that is causing this emotion? What does your programming say that it must have here in order to be safe, worthy or happy?  
5. More specifically, is this attachment one based on your personality’s need for self-worth, security, control, pleasure or freedom?
6. Does all of your being feel this way? Are all the parts of you feeling this way?
7. Are there are parts of you that do not feel that way?
8. Can you actually be the one who is feeling the emotions here, if there are parts of yourself that are not feeling this way?
9. "Who is actually feeling this pain, fear or other emotion?"
10. Thus this must be only a part of you that is feeling this way?
11.  If you are able to observe that part of you that feels that way, then you cannot be that part. Then who or what are you?
12. Now the question is, what is the role you are identifying with that is causing you to be attached to this for security, control or self-worth. What or who do you «believe you are» here which is causing these emotions?
13. Does this role or aspect of your personality define you? Is this the entirety of your being. If you stop being that role, do you stop existing?
14. Can you feel larger than that role?
15. Can you accept that a small part of you has identified with that role and is feeling this way, but that you are something much greater and beyond that?
16. Can you accept and love that subpersonality or persona (part of your self) that is attached and fearful here concerning this issue?
17. Can you let go of that part of yourself and while honoring it, go beyond it and experience yourself as a soul in evolution or as a consciousness witnessing this part of yourself that has been programmed in this way?
18. What truths would you like to share with this role or subpersonality?
19. What do you believe that part of yourself that is feeling this way needs to learn?
20. What can that part of yourself do in order to learn that lesson?
21. Is there something you need to share with that part of yourself so that it can learn that lesson or feel better?
22. Is there something that you can do externally – such as changing habits or activities or behaviors that will help that part of yourself become free from its attachment and /or emotions?
23. Now that you understand that you are not these roles and that you are not your personality, what is your relationship with your personality, or how would you like that relationship to be?
24. Now that you realize that you are not this body, mind or personality, how do you feel about this issue?
25. Again, if you are able to observe those emotions and beliefs, how can you be them?
26. And if these emotions and beliefs change or disappear – which they surely will - then will you disappear? If not then you cannot be those emotions or beliefs. Then who or what are you and what is your relationship to these emotions, beliefs and your mind?
 
And some questions to ponder on in your free time.
27. Can you remember when you were not identified with this role, when you were not a mother, father, professional, etc
28. Did you not exist?
29. Who or what were you then?
30. Where is your existence centered?
31. Who would you be if you removed all of the roles you are identified with – if you were on a desert island?
32. Who will you be when you leave your body?
34. Who were you before you entered you body?
34. Who would you be if you had no arms, legs?
35. Who would you be if you could not talk or hear or see?
36. Where and what is your true self?
37. Who are you when you have no consciousness of the external world - when you are sleeping?
38. If you are indeed eternal as all religions agree and your body and mind are not – then who or what are you?